“At one magical instant in your early childhood, the page of a book—that string of confused, alien ciphers—shivered into meaning. Words spoke to you, gave up their secrets; at that moment, whole universes opened. You became, irrevocably, a reader.” –Alberto Manguel

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Saturday, August 29, 2015

Breaking The Writer's Block

Hey.. Peeps.. :) It’s nice to have people asking what happened, why you stopped posting blog. They ask when you are writing next, I thought nobody gives a damn for what I write but then few people write me back and say –hey, when is next post coming. Sometimes, it is enough to keep me going. I don’t know, at times I want to make my blog private so only I can see and no one else. Sometimes, I regret telling to people about my blog –those people who don’t understand a thing and find me bragging. But then, I always believed –there’s no regret; you either do or don’t. I chose to do. Well, I am writing this post to get over that "writer's block" phase.

Well, people have mouth and they will talk. You gotta hold your head high and live the way you want. Sometimes, you gotta let things go –nice things too. They ain’t good enough to hold on to. Sometimes, you like a part of something and rest of it makes you feel no good. Letting go is never giving up, I never want to give up and want to be a reason for people to look up to me and say –you the reason I am not giving up, little kids especially. 

At times you know something is not right and you don’t know how long it is gonna take to be fine. You just keep it normal. You go to work, meet people. Talk like always, and they never guess if something is wrong. You just lose focus, that thing is still there but you are too engaged in things to think about that. I like being busy. But when you go back home, you realize it is still going on and not over yet, it is like anesthesia –you can’t feel for a while but when you gain senses you go like –damn, this is gonna hurt.

I don’t know but I feel money makes you stupid.  A year back, I used to visit home twice a year. I was making less money then but I was wiser than I am today. I used to save and when I find a good balance, I used to fly back home and buy gifts. I even did cost cutting and never regretted that. Now, I can fly back home any goddamn day but I keep postponing. I think nothing to worry, I will go any day I want and it is going to be a year in October –I don’t know what the weather there is. Oh, and I am so obstinate –I want my mom dad to come here and am angry they not coming. I miss them.

Some people are always nice to you, no matter what and when you realize you were not that nice to them –you wonder why they are nice? And I sometimes think like, it is okay some people ain’t nice to me too. Remember that song –Carry On by Nate Ruess, Fun: “But I like to think, I can cheat it all to make up for the times, I've been cheated on..” I know that’s stupid, but okay –you have to be stupid at times to look back and laugh at. Ain’t it? P.S. I changed my blog name from Carté Blanche to Blue Ink. I lost a follower too, ouch! Signing out, may God bless y’all. :)

2 comments:

  1. lovely pic......insomniac hands scribbling on the type-writer...money is a strange thing.......inspite of it's hollowness....it has to be valued for the structure society has built around it.......I feel ur blog that reads like reading more of a diary than a blog....I hope u get over that writer's block and keep posting.......the diversity in the world makes things difficult and beautiful at the same time.....there are people that operate all the time playing 'social games of upmanship'......some others are trying to adjust...a few fall prey...a few don't know where it's all going......perhaps they don't want to know it......October has almost come....lovely winter slows down the pace of all....giving time to reflect on the bygone moments.......I find life strange...sometimes a few moments well spent..just getting lost in the winter haze seemingly much enjoyable adn cherishable moments that the entire other life-time....and then there are things different..people different...might not be good or bad but simply different...discovering a few blogs that have so many posts being posted for such a long time..and none commented...i wonder what motivates that blogger to keep writing so continously long for a blog that no one reads...and it's always a dilemma whether to keep the blog public or private...went through that phase and decided to keep it publicly dead indefinitely..like a postcard once written.....and nice new title....'blue ink'..........tc.....(post getting ridiculously long... feels like hitting backspace but that 'publish' button is nearer....:))

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    1. Its always nice to read your comments, honest and clear. Lengthy, of course but never regret reading. Loved this line -"and then there are things different..people different...might not be good or bad but simply different." Seconnd that. Matter is not to post publicaly or privately. Matter is to never stop writing. I write in my phone like every day. Sometimes, that time too when in sleep I wake up some how and check time. Nobody knows what I write but I do, and then I read it when I am bored or caught up in writer's block. Don't you dare to hit that backspace key. Somethings, raw and unedited are beautiful. Blue Ink makes a lot sense to me. I can't explain. That's why this name. :) Take Care.

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