I have been grey a lot –lately. I guess, I always was grey. I used to over sleep or be insomniac for couple of days –but then I used to wake up around 2 or 3 a.m. out of nowhere –feeling thirsty, sometimes ‘cause of nightmares and couldn’t go back to sleep. I started using that time cutting articles, favorite images and quotes from newspaper. I had a (too many diaries) diary with all those quotes and articles I can’t forget, images which I can stare for long time. Oh, I got a dream catcher last week –a blue one. Here’s the pic.
Why I feel like grey, ‘cause I feel there’s nothing pure black or white. There has always been a hint of grey. Lisa Ling quoted –There's so much grey to every story –nothing is so black and white. And I like grey, I like it that way. You are never completely happy –there’s always something that bothers you a little –and trust me, we are alive till it is there. Then there’s Rebecca Solnit who quoted - There are infinite shades of grey. Writing often appears so black and white. I can’t deny that.
I have been like –either I will go or not and I never had other option in my mind. How fond we are of having options, but sometimes it is not easy. How about feeling like you want to go but can’t –that’s grey. I don’t know, I like this word grey now that I wanna ink it on me. But then, I feel like what if I get bored of seeing grey inked in blue over my wrist –you see, that’s grey am talking about.
I like travelling, I always planned to travel and explore world –places, people, language, flora and fauna and own a travel blog with zillion pictures. Earlier I couldn’t plan trips. Now I can, I have everything that’s required. Gawd knows what’s stopping me. Am I addicted to procrastination? Yes, I guess. I want to go visit kids in an orphanage –I shortlisted some nearby but honestly I postponed –Gawd knows why.
Over past weeks, I thought –may be you don’t need a group or bunch of people to plan trips. May be you just have to start and you will find them on way. Just pack your bags and get lost –come back with tan and pictures. Just get out of that damn room you’re locked into and wander. Tell stories and you’ll get audience. I am bad at figuring out maps and locating places –too bad. Bad at crossing roads and remembering the landmarks, it looks all same to me. But, someday I have to learn to be lost and be back home all by myself.
We all are grey –I can eat little or too much but then I am always hungry for muffins and brownies. Grey better defines me. I hate some people, I like some people –but sometimes, I choose to ignore people. We choose grey when we don’t want too much of anything. We all lie in grey –like Earth is said to be in between Heaven and Hell. How could somebody possibly be not grey? There were few other thoughts about grey I had, which are lost to oblivion. Whatever I can recall are inked here. Be grey! Signing out.. may God bless y’all.. :)