Ugly Duckling Gonna Be An Engineer

Hello.. reader.. :) today I gave last exam of b.tech.. gonna get engineering degree soon.. gonna be an engineering graduate.. feels great.. :) but still no signs of placement.. still jobless.. what will I do next?? That's a big question standing infront of me.. :( but that's ok.. I don't give up so soon.. :) My hope is still "in pink" n I thank Jesus for gifting me loads of "optimism" :D

Hmm.. Engineering!! never my option.. "this life chooses everything for us if, we don't choose life for us".. n that was the only mistake I made.. I never "stuck to my guns".. But now I do.. Yeah, I do it madly!! n that's why I call myself "an ugly duckling".. :O

Life: this 4 letter word has always been a "big puzzle" for me.. I have always tried to unfold it.. but it never happened.. but still 'am "on" I am not gonna give up this soon.. :)

College life o'er.. no more lectures.. bunks.. sessionals.. assignments.. practicals.. somewhere 'am gonna miss this "phase" of my life.. but I have always believed a line: "Both shall pass" n I feel perfectly fine after reading this line whenever I feel low.. n that's why I have "etched" this line on my study table.. :)

These 4 years of b.tech turned me more "stoic".. I mean I must say I have learnt many things apart from engineering.. Life can never be the same.. n that's why I strongly hope.. I mean I can bet you anything.. that these "rainy days" of my life will end so soon.. :) sounds crazy.. ain't it?? but I believe so.. :)

I hope a much better life for me.. n I would love it if I'll do it on my own.. :) Give me power n passion Lord.. :) Amen!! Currently listening: "Changes in my life" by Mark Sherman.. I love this song.. :) 

Winding my prose here.. may God bless ya all.. :)

B'day Surprise: Out Of The Blues

Hello.. dear reader.. :) Today when I woke up in the morning.. then I was down with fever.. I just got faint n fell down.. I donno what's that.. may be because of this fuckin' summer.. I was really shocked.. I thought what's happening with me.. I had exam today.. n I thought how will I give exam in this pathetic condition.. Somehow I managed to give exam.. I took all that yucky tablets.. eewww :/

I went to exam center, gave exam, exam went good!! :) Then I asked one of my friend to drop me.. I ride n he drove fast.. :) Then he turned his bike on the way to "Coffee Hut" I was screaming at him to get back on my way.. Then we stepped in " Coffee Hut".. Then all my other friends joined us.. :O I thought what's going on??

My B'day Cake By My Friends

Then came a surprise.. A "b'day cake".. on the table.. I was surprised.. that moment all my damn fever gone.. :P I cut the cake, they sang b'day song for me.. :D

Then they asked me to give treat.. I  said ok .. :) One of my friend supported me in cash.. Thanx to him.. :P These are friends.. they come unannounced.. :P We njoyed the evening.. It was an awesome b'day I ever had in my B. Tech.. Thank u all.. for planning all this n making all this so memorable.. may Lord bless ya all.. :)

2 Decades + 2 Years

Hello.. reader.. :) Today I have completed my 22 years.. in other words today is my b'day.. yay.. feels great.. everybody's wishing me, parents trying to fullfill all my wishes n everything's happening according to my choice.. All these friends and my family turned this day into a happy episode.. thank u Lord for gifting me such loving family n friends.. :)

As always on my every birthday I leave one of my "bad habit" n so this year also I have decided to leave a bad habit.. I must say I have a very bad habit of leaving my work on tomorrow.. so by today I am gonna leave this habit and will try to do all my work in time.. :)

My B'day Cake

I got my favourite cake flavour n many best wishes.. I love this day.. every one loves I guess.. :P Thank u.. thank u.. thank u all who wished me n made my day.. 

Semesters r going on.. n that's the only thing which is at wrong time.. :/ otherwise I have enjoyed this day alot.. I have decided to go out with duplicate n other friends to make out most of this day.. but these sems have always been such a "bête noire" for me.. :/

Any ways it was a nice day.. may God bless ya all.. :)

Obnoxiously Turning Foul-Mouthed

Hello.. reader.. :) Yesterday was my first exam of the last semester of B.Tech.. Paper was a complete disaster, total crap.. first thought came to my mind: it's not my paper.. then I saw n heard myself saying: "oh fuck"

I m noticing that these days am using complete slangs in full version.. I am turning "foul-mouthed" n I feel so great after expressing it.. I'm lovin' it.. lol.. ;) n that's so obnoxious; I know.. :O well, that's the another change I am noticing in me after november!!

Argh.. yesterday's exam was worst, pathetic.. I wish I could score 30+ n after calculating I think I can.. :O Oh God I donno how next exam will be like??

Am so bored these days.. I wish I could sneak out from my window someday n do whatever I wanna do.. without thinking what will people say.. but I know I can't.. :/

Now I don't give a damn to what others are thinking of me.. I just fuck off!! I know this world is full of sluts n whores.. n I know how to kick 'em out.. I want to be me.. n that's the way I am.. if u like me; be my friend n if don't then stop bitching about me at my back.. n go hell!! 

Hmm.. next exam on may 24.. n see how its gonna be.. all the best to me.. :) may God bless ya all.. :)

Reality Bites.. Blergh!!

Hello reader.. I remember a line by Carol Burnett: "words, once they are printed, have a life of their own". Now I can see this line turning into reality.. Ah, these realities stand like a fix transparent wall in front of us.. U can see the other side but u can't go that side.. I m facing these realities now..

The countdown has begun.. B.Tech is gonna over soon.. Semesters are there from may 21'11- may 31'11 n I donno what I am gonna do in this 10 days war.. but I can manage as always.. The last semester, then no more lectures, assignments, sessionals, presentations, project..

Still jobless.. :( n this breaks me every time.. but its me; I am "stoic" now I don't let all this break me.. but still all this keeps on running in my mind 24x7.. m lost Lord, "walk me home".. :O Everyday I manage to hope for best, but its not happening.. what's wrong??

But here am not meant to always blame n regret for what I am missing.. this fuckin life can cheat me but I bet I will never let it break me down.. I'll get what I am fishing for.. n this "Mr. Fate"(luck) is still sleeping.. luck is also not working.. bad time is running I guess.. feels like troubles are "static".. argh.. :/ fuckin lame!! :S

But its ok.. I had promised to welcome bad times with same frequency.. let's see who wins..?? n I am strong enough to bet: I'll win.. :) Life's a tough combo of good n worst things, n all I have to do is extract the best part of it.. 

Reality is the thing I have to meet everyday, does not matter if I treat it like unwanted guests.. it makes a place of its own n I have to welcome it half-heartedly.. well life is full of these kinda things..

But I know somewhere deep in my soul that my Lord will never let me down.. May Lord help me to find my way.. n may God bless ya all. :)

You'll Be Pushing Up The Daisies Mr. Fear!!

Dear Fear,

I want u to fuck off n leave me alone.. I don't need u anymore in my life.. Got that?? What the hell u are doing here with me.. ?? Get the hell off here or I'll sue u.. :/ 

You r there in my life since God knows when.. U are like a "weed" for me.. I'll "crop" u out someday..Yeah U know what; now m gonna chase all this crap.. I am gonna do all that I am afraid of, let's see who's the man?? Ah look at u; u are turning "po-faced"..

And u'll be "pushing up the daisies" very soon.. So don't u dare to knock my door again.. I swear I'll wring your neck.. :/ I don't need u so just get off my way.. 

Help me Lord.. to "elbow out this fuckin fear"!!

Another Farewell Party \m/

Hello dear reader.. :) Today I attended an awesome farewell party, n this was from our branch juniors.. Thank you juniors for adding some more beautiful memories in my life.. We even haven't given them fresher's party still they managed such an awesome party for us.. that's so sweet of 'em.. feels great.. \m/

Enjoyed the whole day.. n the day turned out to be a best memory to cherish forever.. :) Thank you Lord for letting all this happen.. :) I owe you everything I have.. :) 

I was asked to perform a ramp-walk.. n I roughly managed it.. I am too naïve at it.. yeah  :P Then I danced madly, enjoyed the supper n it was a fun being there.. a great day that will keep me happy atleast a week. :)

Then I returned home on a friend's bike.. n the ride was awesome. world feels great on bike.. I guess.. :O Thank u friend for dropping me.. :) But the people on road kept a "hawk's eye" on us.. Oh goddammit, why the hell they think a girl riding on a guy's bike is his girlfriend.. retro world!! I f***** hate this.. :/ n when I sat in a taxi to reach home then two guys commented negatively, totally absurd.. I hate these "peeping toms".

Chuck these things.. I meet these kinda stuff almost everyday.. Everyday on my way to college I met such "cunts".. :/

Anyways; soon I'll get all the pics n then will upload on facebook.. yay.. :) So this was a happy episode of my life n probably the last party of b.tech.. :( Winding my prose here.. may God bless ya all.. :)

Whimsical Side Of The World I Live In

Hello.. dear reader.. :) Experiencing the whimsical side of the world I live in.. people change so fast.. I can't figure out the reason behind it.. :/ I donno how some people can be so hypocrite?? I can never understand these peoples.. they pretend what they are not.. n I must say they r awesome actors to portray themselves.. They r like  "Monalisa" which still continues to be a mystery.. Ain't it??

Actually their life is like a drama, their words a dialogue n they keep on playing their roles.. ah, these complications never seem to end!! I go "tongue tied" whenever all this happens.. stupid me..:/ 

Why am I talking 'bout all this crap..?? I guess somewhere it matters for me?? ah no.. not anymore!! I sometime sound like a loser.. like now.. :(

People come and go, they come; get their work done n forget like we never met.. they r turning so professional n me still a "nincompoop".. n I f***** hate being so dumb!! :/ They call u, text u whenever they need help.. n when u contact 'em for the same they'll list u 100s of reasons.. n I still manage to believe 'em.. Damn it!! I need to grow up!!

This world is full of surprises.. n everyday I meet new surprises.. some paste a smile n some give a heart-break; n life continues to be like this!! I hate this sudden change, which comes totally unannounced!! :/

Albert Einstein said: "This world is a dangerous place; not because of those who do evil but because of those who look on n do nothing" n now I agree!!

Few friends of mine r pleasing me to join the farewell party tomorrow.. n I have already said no to 'em.. they r annoyed now.. I wish they could read this blog of mine n get some idea of why 'am not willing to go.. :O but no one is interested to read a crap I use to write!! That's fine.. I'll manage all this.. 'cuz I use to.. Oh! help me Lord; may God bless ya all.. :)

 

The Last Day Of B.Tech

Hello reader.. Today was the last day of my b.tech (most probably).. n the last sessional.. well it was an awesome day.. :) 

After the sessional exam, we began our "signing campaign".. :D all that, slam books, diaries, cameras were there to capture the maximum memories (to remember).. I must say this was the day when I felt like: oh its over; damn!! Am gonna miss all my friends.. :O

But its okay, every thing has a span.. n its well said:

A little pain, a little pleasure;

A little heaping up of treasure.

Then no more gazing upon the sun;

All things must end that have begun.

Then I went to H.O.D's office n he stamped his name as signature (on my uniform)..:) crazy.. ain't it?? :P

N u know what.. we  are invited for our farewell party on may 16'11 at "Zaayka" :) this is from our branch juniors.. :) n 'am not going.. I mean, I don't wanna go.. n I donno why?? :/

Leave it, yea.. then after we finished our "signing campaign" n "photo shoot" we left saying goodbyes.. :O

then I joined a friend's birthday treat at "Babian" and enjoyed the evening fullest.. :) 

when I returned home the first thing I did was: I read all the comments and compliments I got while the signing campaign (on my uniform).. :) n the second thing was: I updated my facebook status to: "Probably the last day of b.tech today.. awesome day!! Happy 'cuz 'am releasing from this "asylum".. but m gonna miss all my friends.. :O"

Overall a nice day.. got few best memories to remember.. :) May all my friends get placed n may God bless ya all.. :)

Ennui Accompanied With Enigmatic Smile

Hello.. reader.. :) Life continues to be mysterious.. with no signs of improvement.. I must say after long days of my ennui I felt signs of change in my mood.. n this change feels pretty awesome.. :)

Sessional exams are going on.. n I must say I don’t like sitting for 3 hours n write those non-sense 40 pages in exams.. anyways: I was mugging up few topics in taxi in morning today n I saw a cute baby sitting next to me.. holding my fingers.. n I must say that was an awesome n a pleasant beginning of the day.. :) Although my today’s exam went worst, pathetic.. n add some more synonyms like this.. :/

While I was returning home in a taxi.. a crazy funny episode crept into my mind.. n I began to smile (enigmatically).. but before people sitting around me start thinking me a fool; I just took out my cell-phone n opened my inbox just to pretend that I am smiling reading some funny texts.. n I must say I am too bad at acting. ;) LOL !! :D

But here I can tell what I was smiling at?? Well going into flashback 2 months ago.. it was the first week of march 2011.. when I bunked one of my sessional exam n sneaked out with my friends on a huge treat.. I really enjoyed that day.. :)

But 2-3 days before that treat I was quite upset n I desperately needed something to make up my mood.. but that day I was really happy.. I just got no idea to express my happiness.. As usual all my other friends were busy with their own lives.. n I bet you people can’t imagine what I did to express my happiness.. :O

So I just went to my room.. locked it from inside, got myself on my bed n jumped many times on my bed.. just like monkeys.. LOL :D sounds crazy?? N today all this came to my mind.. n I still feel life is not that bad.. :)

Ah!! Another sessional tomorrow.. n I have to study; though I know I won’t.. :P Winding up my prose.. may God bless ya all..:)

Letting The Memories Fade Away

Hello reader.. I have decided to forget all the worst things of past.. Now I have no time to regret n blame for all the worst things happened.. Gonna complete my b.tech by this june.. so I wish to dump all those bad things here.. I know, what am doing.. n its the thing I must had done pretty earlier.. but its ok..'cuz  its never late to do good things.. ain't it?? 

Erasing all the memories I saved as a symbol of "God knows what".. Its been a month I haven't looked back to those things, I haven't wrote 'bout it, I have deleted/removed everything that was connected to it.. n now 'am out of that mess.. feels great.. thanx Lord for always being there.. :)

I haven't wrote about it in my diary since a month, not even read 'bout it that I wrote earlier.. it was a phase n its gone.. n I don't want it back now at any cost.. I spent my maximum happiness to afford this comfort, n now I don't wanna lose all this comfort which I gained at the expense of my happiness..

"Life has always been a best teacher for me n I have always been a worst student in the lessons n tests of life; always hiding from teacher so that I don't get caught".. I was never interested in the lessons of life.. but now I have to.. n I will.. :)

Now things r going to be fine soon.. :) happy again.. :) thanx Lord.. may God bless ya all.. :)

A Thing Called Nothing

Hello dear reader.. :) Sometimes in life a time comes when we r more comfortable with "nothing".. ain't it?? Sometimes we smile/ laugh remembering some old episodes of life n others think we have gone nuts.. n when they ask the reason behind that (enigmatic) smile we say: nothing.. n people continue to call us a jerk.. I know it happens with everyone over here.. :)

This "nothing" becomes more joyful sometimes to draw a big smile on your face n sometimes a reason to give u a heart-break.. Somewhat is happening here with me.. :)

I will say 'nothing" in support of my answer if u ask me what I'm upto these days?? n I know that's a PJ.. lets laugh it off.. :D Yea.. here 'am wearing a stupid smile.. :)

Many things happen with us n we call it "nothing" when asked by others.. may be 'cuz we ain't interested in narrating the thing happened.. whatever.. let it be..

I can't write everything happening in my life.. but I must say there is an increment in the episodes where I say "nothing".. :) sounds stupid?? again laugh it off.. :D Yea a little bit more.. yea that way.. ;) PJs again.. :P

So.. I guess I have to move on with this "nothing" n close this chapter here.. reason: semesters are coming n as usual I haven't studied a cent.. ;) otherwise when people will ask 'bout my score then I'll have to say "nothing" lolzz.. :D so trying to study.. turning n counting the pages to know how much I have to mug up?? Oh its too much.. No matter, its the last time.. :) All the best to me for sems.. :) may God bless all.. :)

Single But Not Available

Hello.. to the reader of this blog.. Ah.. where to start with?? Okay.. here am trying to begin.. People think if a person is single then he/she has to go with anyone.. I mean how can it be possible.. Just because I'm single doesn't mean I have to get involved with someone.. 

Being single is cool I think.. Single and alone r two different things, n people mix these two things.. n its well said: "those r never alone who r accompanied with noble thoughts".. n so m not alone.. :)

Few things in life r introduced in strange n obnoxious way.. n few things happen unannounced n "out of the blues".. I wonder to see the things happening with me n around me.. n I shrug in wonder what Jesus has planned for me.. :O

I can understand the feeling of "not having" the things u r desperately waiting for.. I donno which way to follow.. I have noticed; the things I never wanted in life r closely present next to me.. 

I have both happiness n sorrow n still I donno how to winnow this f***** sorrow.. how to elbow out the worst things happening?? I am accepting everything coming my way.. pretending n nodding my head as a symbol of acceptance.. 

I had promised myself to accept everything Lord has planned for me to give.. no matter if its happiness or sorrow, I accept both with same frequency.. n that's what life is all about.. 

But what's the solution for the new "victim of change"?? I know this life is so bitch.. "It gives the test first n lesson afterwards".. But fine, I know somehow I'll find my way.. no matter what.. If dreaming is wrong then I don't wanna be right.. taking all my challenges as my opportunities.. n I bet I'll make best out of it.. :)

So m happily single n need no one to make a change in my status.. I love to be single, 'cuz I'm in love with me.. no more explanations required.. rest; I don't give a damn to those f***** people who keep a "HAWK'S EYE" on others.. I hate such "PEEPING TOMS".. 

So here I go; to get what I wanna be, n I bet I'll be back with loads of satisfaction n happiness I am fishing for.. All the best to me.. :) may God bless all.. :)

Agony Of Being Me

Hello.. all, seeing new turn in my life.. this life has landed me into the world of dreams.. now I m on the road that I have to travel alone..

I m worried 'bout my future.. gonna be a future nomad.. I donno how will I prepare myself to step into the world I never wanna live in.. I donno how will I manage myself to accept the fake happiness, n I donno how long this fake happiness will last..

The trouble with me is the more I run to grab the stuffs I want the more they go away.. n now its making me feel like loser.. n keep on askin' me to give up.. there r the days when we feel like nothing.. n we can't figure out the reason behind it.. n it keeps on pinching us.. my heart pops out when I look at myself so broken sometimes.. 

I can see myself going so dumb.. why do changes happen.. why ain't somethings static, why do we propose n God dispose?? Sometimes I donno what I am.. sometimes I feel so rough inside.. n when I search for reason then I get myself so confused..

I know it does not matter for anybody for who I am.. all my friends who use to talk me, text me, chat me, call me today will forget me.. I bet!! n they will get busy with their respective dreams, responsibilities n life.. do they also feel the same as I do?? I donno.. if I'll ask 'em then they'll laught it off.. I know..

I know; no body's is interested in reading this blog of mine.. why do they read a crap like this?? But I write to express, no matter how boring it may seem.. I write to gain comfort I get after writing.. it may sound stupid I know.. 

Less than a month left n I'll depart from my graduation.. n I donno what m gonno do after that.. 'cuz whatever I wanna do seems stupid to my parents, n whatever they want me to do is not less than to die twice.. I must say doing b.tech was the biggest mistake I made.. I can't forget these 4 years that made me almost dead.. now I can't die for 2 more years doing masters.. 

It hurts when I turn back in past n see the episodes of my failure.. why do the worst things leave a scar?? I lost the best 4 years of my life in doing b.tech which was never my choice n option.. I spent 4 years in hope of job, n it yielded me nothing.. it left me broken, all I have r: allegations, frustrations, n a hope that may end anytime.. these 4 years might be more beautiful if I had denied to join engineering.. but then I was not aware of the consequences I m facing today..

Whom to blame for all these things?? sometimes I think its ok to lose 4 yeas doing b.tech 'cuz b.tech was my parent's dream.. but simultaneously a fleeting thought proves me wrong when I think what 'bout my dream?? Am tossed between these two things.. n I can't find a way.. I remember "Ricky Martin's" song "Private Emotion" which goes like:

Every endless night has a dawning day
Every darkest sky has a shining ray
And it shines on you baby can't you see
You're the only one who can shine for me
It's a private emotion that fills you tonight
And a silence falls between us
As the shadows steal the light
And wherever you may find it
Wherever it may lead
Let your private emotion come to me

All these r the things I am going through.. n I know its just a phase but its so dark n I can't find myself.. Help me lord to find my way.. may God bless all.. :)

Invisible Wounds

I must say this world is still a mystery to unfold.. all the people around me r hard to understand.. some r pretending, some r helping, some r hypocrites, some r really caring.. n the list for variety of peoples goes on..

Few things that you have planned to do never get chance to turn 'em into reality.. or in other words, they does not exist.. if they exist then they exist in dreams only.. n no other place is meant for those things..

Today I realized.. peoples r available in various versions around us.. n u will never know which one is their original one?? n don't u dare to figure it out, 'cuz whatever will seem original one to u may be the wrong one.. I donno what's behind all these things.. Paul Ekman's book "Telling Lies" may help u..

Somethings in this world r so shocking.. I mean these things comes like a wave n flows everything away, n u'll never figure it out which wave done that.. when these kinda things steps in ur world then they make no noise, they enter unannounced.. n all u can do is "shrug in despair".. blaming everything around u.. n the worst part is when u can't name 'em what's going on, n people around u continue to make fun of u.. n somewhat is with me.. :( 

Thomas Stone said in "Cure By Crying": Cry as more as u can, 'cuz there r very less occassions when this life permits us open tear release without irritating anyone.. n it should be out 'cuz if u'll bury 'em in ur heart then it will be out someday in form of some disease.. so the thing that can give relief may become the ingredients of disease also.. n its right!! I agree..

What to say now.. I guess bad days r more longer than good ones.. :( But I know it will end some day.. I hope.. I could go back n mend everything.. but I know its not possible.. but I can learn from 'em n move on.. n this is the only thing in my favour.. so go girl..!! :)

A Day In Despair

Hello.. dear reader.. today I lost my maximum hope.. I went to H.O.D's office today, n he just rudely said: m gonna suffer in marks this sem.. 'cuz I haven't attended classes.. I have attended only 2 lectures.. n the reason 4 not attending his lectures is: he teaches nothing.. whatever he teaches is totally a crap, n of no use.. 

It really sucks to sit for an hour to tolerate whatever he is teaching.. all my time goes in checking the time left in getting his lecture o'er.. :/ n he warned me that he'll post a letter at my home for not attending classes n I froze there.. :(

Second thing that's troubling me the most these days is "project".. I donno why this project is so boring.. n I can see no signs of improvement in it.. I don't give a damn.. but it holds 200 marks.. so I need to work on it.. blergh :/ I just wish this thing to get over as soon as it can be.. 

Another thing that's poking me r sessionals n semesters.. yeah sems r appearing "on the wings of the wind" n I haven't studied a word..

All these things r givin' me headache n I just can't afford to lose my internal marks.. :( Gosh!! these last days of b.tech r so boring, dumb n hectic.. :/ I'm still jobless.. holding a fear to step in future.. I donno what will I do after b.tech?? n all this is because of my f***** branch.. :/

Sometimes I think to quit all.. but then a fleeting thought comes in my mind that its not my way of doing things, I mean I don't lose hope so soon, but now it seems hard to stay the same.. all my troubles seems so static.. n I donno how to make it the way it is supposed to be.. leavin' everything on u Lord.. Hope everything will be fine soon.. may God bless ya all.. :)

Farewell: Sayonara

Hello.. to all the readers of my blog.. :) Yesterday was my farewell.. n last night was awesome.. :) \m/ I was dressed in "saree" as it was the dress-code.. I have never worn it before.. n  I just don't like to wear it.. I can't tolerate that 6 meter cloth.. :/

Greeting Card By Juniors

Anyways.. the venue was awesome.. everything was awesome.. all were busy in adjusting their pixels, all were moshing, n it was a fun to be there.. n now I realize what I'd miss if I'd dropped my idea to join the party.. :O

I was asked there: why I speak so less?? n I shrugged n heard myself saying: what.. is it so?? n I donno why they think so.. may be m not that familiar to 'em.. :O

But it was a great day.. the "welcome" was awesome.. juniors "escorted" us very well.. n we got "title", a sweet greeting card, a rose, a photo, and lots of best wishes for future.. :) 

Then we danced madly.. more than 2 hours on dance floor.. I danced untill I began to sweat hard, n I got my legs ache hard.. it was nice to see myself happy n moshing like this.. :) yay!! \m/ 

Then I returned to a friend's hostel n stayed there whole night.. watched pics, discussed about the party, laughed hard on stupid pics n all n then slept nicely.. I laughed till it began to gimme a stomach pain.. :)

I'll miss all these crazy things.. :( But I bet this life will offer me many happy days like this.. :) may God bless ya all.. :)