“At one magical instant in your early childhood, the page of a book—that string of confused, alien ciphers—shivered into meaning. Words spoke to you, gave up their secrets; at that moment, whole universes opened. You became, irrevocably, a reader.” –Alberto Manguel

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Saturday, April 30, 2011

Alpha & Omega Of IIT-K

Hello all.. now I got the time to write here in my blog.. a thing to share.. I went IIT-K for my project work.. n I was so much bored there.. it was just so uneasy for me to stay there.. :( I have to learn MAT Lab n it was the worst part of those 2 days in IIT-K.. I was missing my I-pod badly.. :(

But I must say IIT is a best place for all those who r fond of studying and research.. n these people r so helping.. Gosh!! I can't believe these kinda people still exist in this wicked world of cut-throat competition.. :O :)

Everything was boring.. right from journey to MAT Lab basics to staying there in a small 8x10 (approx) room.. :/ It felt like am living in a "shoe-box" n I felt I'll die of "claustrophobia" for sure.. :/ I was so tired.. n annoyed also for not getting suitable time to learn MAT Lab.. I hate when the things go in such an obnoxious way.. argh!! :/

Last night I returned back from that "asylum".. n now at home everything seems to be alright.. True; there's no place like home.. Now I have to go for shopping for the farewell party.. aww!! :( I hate shopping.. :/ Busy days r on..

Project, Presentations, Sessionals, Semesters; these r the 4 levels I have to go through to get my graduation complete.. I'm bored of this f***** life.. yeah..!! :/ Hope I do well in all these 4 levels.. 

My happiness seems to be a MIRAGE.. It feels like its there but when I reach for it to grab.. either it moves a bit far or it becomes a dream.. Hope I perform all my duties well.. :) may God bless ya all.. :)

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Rotten Memories Bouncing Back

Again I can find myself in a soup!! I donno when will I get rid from these mood swings.. All the bad things happened earlier are surrounding me again.. n this is the thing that makes me go biased.. The more I try; the worse it gets.. N still I donno how to cope up with all these things.. :( 

Life's goin' on n I know it will be ON no matter what.. but its not the way it is supposed to be.. I am goin' so whimsical, capricious these days, even I donno at which moment I will let myself down.. n I hate this part of mine.. :/

I'm gonna get an awesome farewell party this may 01'11.. 
n look at the stupid side of mine: 'am not willing to go.. :( All my friends r so excited about it; even they have decided what they are wearing.. 

n me like a dumbo; haven't yet decided whether m goin' or not.. :O What the heck is this?? :/ Even I know it would be a great fun to be there still; m "stick to my guns" about not goin'.. :/
Let it be.. it will be fine.. as always.. just a matter of few days.. but still I donno, is this with me only or with every individual over here?? This is a question that's waving high in my confused mind!! 

Well finally I have decided to go.. as my friends are pleasing me so much (which they ain't suppose to).. n I know it will change my mood.. so being a good girl am going to join the party.. the last party of b.tech, I guess !! Hopin' every thing will come back to normal.. may God bless all.. :)

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Relinquished To Redeemed

My I-Pod (Music:My First Love)
Hello people.. :) Today, I changed my facebook as well as this blog's user name to "redeemed".. earlier it was relinquished, now I wonder; those were the days n these r the days.. :) 'cuz now i have decided to come outta this mess.. so m gon'a erase and change every thing that connects me with that crap.. sounds cool?? And music has always been like a great companion for me; in every phase of my life.. I love music, no end!! \m/ And that's why I can't live without my I-Pod!! :) Yea now its gon'a be alright.. yay!!  :)
Today I went out with "duplicate" (my only real friend, whom i can trust n i bet she will never let me down) n njoyed the evenin' the fullest.. :)
Today is "GOOD FRIDAY" (Crucifixion of Jesus).. and 'am plannin' to visit church this "EASTER SUNDAY" :) I believe in "Jesus Christ" alot.. and "He" has always helped me in every phase of my life :) n I owe "Him" everything I have.. :)
And what else?? Yeah.. may be I have to go to the college tomorrow.. :( :/ again all that boring lectures.. argh!! :/
Its 12:46 a.m tikin' in my clock.. gotta go now.. have to wake up early.. yea for that suckin' lectures.. :O may Lord bless ya all.. Good Nyt!! :)

Friday, April 22, 2011

Like Nothing Happened

Hello people.. Hola, Ni Hao, Sers, Buon Giorno .. :) 
Its true all days ain't the same.. till yesterday I was so low.. but now m feelin' much better.. days r passing like seconds, life is fleetin' so fast.. n now 'am regaining my "long-lost-hope".. :) 

N know what, today semester dates are announced.. sems r approaching "on the wings of the wind"..damn!! blergh :/ i'hv really lost all my interest in studies.. yeah.. I open books a night before exams.. it sucks; no end.. :/ :( any ways leave this crap.. :O

Yeah now everything's gonna be okay.. 'cuz i'hv decided to mend 'em.. no matter what!! :) forgettin' all the wounds of past, forgettin' all the alligations n all; moving forward "like nothing happened".. Its true: "time is the best medicine for the victim of change" ain't it?? :) 

I'hv replaced my dull, soft, operatic playlist from I-pod now.. I have choosen some hard rock, alternative rock, punk music.. n "DJ got us falling in love" by "Usher" is on "loop".. I keep on jumpin' on this song.. :) its awesome.. \m/ try sometime if ya haven't.. :)

Hellen Keller said: If this world is full of suffering, then it is full of overcoming out of it also" n she was right.. :) When good things happen, then I remind all these things, but why not when I need it the most.. that's so stupid of me ;) 

I can list out 100s of real life stories of people who came out from the darkest phases of life and are infront of us as best examples.. 

Like: Beverly Sills, Marva Collin, John Milton, Robert Harold Schuller, John Rice-Greg Rice (Rice Brothers), Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, Jagdish Gandhi, Louis Nizer, Nancy Kissinger, Barbara Walters, Nelson Mandela, n the list will go on.. :O :)

So finally, after spending a good day, receiving a good lesson from life, sharing few moments of my life, n dancing on "DJ got us fallin" (lol) :).. winding up my prose.. may God bless ya all.. :) Good Nyt.. :)

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

The Last Straw

Hello.. to the reader of this page.. :) It's been 3 days; I haven't chated anyone, texted anyone, I just logged in my facebook account yesterday to change my profile pic.. and i can see a no. of status updates from my friends, the world is still the same.. it feels great to be isolated when the external world becomes fake or uneasy to live in.. well, its just a phase i'm goin' through.. nothin' else!!
Robert Harold Schuller says: "there is nothin' like problem, all we see n take as problem is just a solution waiting to be made".. and earlier i use to believe it but now i guess its not that true.. i donno.. if i see i have hapiness as well, i mean; i must be happy n i can list out many reasons like: i must be happy 'cuz i have no backs, i'm havin' a friend like "duplicate", i have a family who loves me unconditionally, but is this enough for me to satisfy my hunger for happiness??
i guess not.. what 'bout my dreams that 'am dying to realise?? what 'bout that single thing that pinches me 24/7?? what 'bout that world; i'hv imagined to live in.. i donno what 'am gon'a do tomorrow.. i donno where will i be tomorrow.. but i do know; all these things r gon'a change so soon..
In past one month i'hv composed 15 poems.. and i can see the themes behind 'em.. it sounds so broken when i read 'em.. i can see my hand-writin' changin' along with my behaviour.. earlier i use to write round fonts, but now i can see pointed fonts flowing from my pen.. n that indicates the aggresion, and an enigmatic sadness i'm goin' through.. i can see spacing between fonts n that denotes loneliness, or isolation.. whatever.. it is.. i know i have to mend all these things.. n all i wish right now is that: may every thing come back to normal.. may i become the way i use to be before november 2010.
All this seems like "the last straw" but i won't allow it to break me down.. Still I can see hope and 'am not gonna lose it so soon.. n I know the day my friends will read this page; they will laugh it off.. they will shrug it off.. they will raise their eye-brows with an open mouth, 'cuz i guess they donno this side of me.. But i know they r gon'a understand all this 'cuz every one goes through this kinda phase.. ain't it?? :O
Yea one more thing: mostly I go for a walk around 7,8 pm.. and I see guys passing comments on me, they look lasciviously on me, and at that moment all i want is to kill 'em.. i hate this thing; no end.. No matter if a guy returns home at 12 a.m. but if a girl comes so late: "JAWS DROP".. I f***** hate this.. n i don't give a damn to these kinda people.. any ways, leave this crap.. "Life is what u take it as".. so better take it as a gift..:) I remember 5 things said by Shakespeare, n I won't forget 'em ever..

> Its only in the destiny of the dark (night) to hold stars.
> It doesn't matter what name u own, what matters is what you'hv done.
> Miserable hath no other medicine but; hope.
> There is nothin' good or bad but thinkin' makes it so.
> A miser person can never fall in love.

And these 5 things make me feel good every time i get down.. :) and this is what we call the magic of words.. :) All i wanna say now is: be optimistic 'cuz "a pessimist is a person who complaints 'bout the noise when opportunity knocks" :)

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Destiny & Other Craps

Many people say to me that every thing is possible, but it sounds hard to believe 'em.. may be 'am "jumpin' my guns" so soon but i can say; many things r possible not evrything.. 'cuz 'am seein' many impossible stuffs happenin' around me.. but my hope is still "in pink"..
i know few things r there that r not meant to be possible.. u can see 'em, feel 'em, dream 'bout 'em, talk n share 'bout 'em but u can't own 'em 'cuz they r not destined to happen.. destiny!! yea i spell d-e-s-t-i-n-y.. matters?? God knows.. i donno..
I remember a quote: "Hope for the best, get ready for the worst; then accept what Lord has choosen to send"..
These lines r okay to support a broken heart, but not enough to mend it.. 
In this world of "cut-throat" competition, u can't believe everyone.. they pretend to be ur friend n when they will get what they want from u they will "back-stab" unannounced..
Not goin' on how n what people do, i don't give a damn now.. lets talk, what's next.. hmm.. so this sem i have to complete a borin' project.. i donno how it will be done.. that's all i can talk about now.. hope tomorrow brings new opportunities for everybody o'er here.. may God bless all.. :)

Enigmatic Sadness

Ah.. where to begin with?? i donno.. what's wrong these days.. may be i know, n 'am unable to figure it out; whatever it is.. its so foreign to my previous experiences..
it was never like this wid me b4.. ne ways..
i promised myself to accept n welcome every phase of my life wid same frequency.. n so i am; n i have to..
These days r lyk so bad.. :( but m not gonna give up so soon.. i'hv read it somewhere.. "good or worst both shall pass" n this is the only hope i have..
well; lemme tell ya 'bout this "enigma sadness" i donno what's d xact reason.. but i know somewhere, somethin' is wrong.. may be a mood swing..
and that's y i just deactivated my  facebook account, switched-off my mobile, goin' to delete orkut account.. n God knows what not.. i just did this to disconnect myself from external world.. n get isolated..
u guise must be thinkin' i'hv turnd nuts.. aww.. i'd say may be.. :O
but there is a thing happend this Novenber 2010, n it brought loads of changes in my life.. n i don't regret.. even m thankful to Lord that it happend.. n its still ON.. may be..
Recalling a quote by John Payne:

A little pain, a little pleasure,
a little heaping up of tresure;
then no more gazing upon the sun,
all things must end that have begun.

n this is what's always on my mind whenever i feel low.. But let it be.. there r many things in this lyf to set heart on.. ain't it?? If we see, happiness is around us.. every little thing that happens every day brings small amounts of happiness, n we simply ignore 'em.. like: smilin' while readin' funny text, hanging out with friends, teasing 'em, receivin' a call from close friends (out of the blues), remindin' some funny episodes of ur previous life, and all the other things like this.. i was a bit happy to see red lilies bloomin' on my roof.. i planted it many days ago, n now it was pleasant to see those bloomin' buds.. :) so.. i must say life is not that bad.. i just remember a song called "Live By The Gun" by Biddu.. An awesome song.. \m/.. Well winding my borin' prose now.. may God bless u all. :)

Monday, April 18, 2011

Little Intro..

Hello.. to all those who r readin' my blog.. well, m new to this blog world.. lots n lots of things r there to share, so m here.. :) Well 'am a student, still huntin' for jobs n placements; i guess m gon'a be a future "nomad".. what else..?? hmm.. life is so borin' these days.. n many reasons behind this.. jobless, hopeless r two big reasons.. do i sound borin'?? ah.. sometimes i do.. :( :/ ne ways, hope ol f ya r doin' good.. hope evry thing's fine vd this world.. :) n may "lord" bless everybody over here.. :)

Who Am I ?

Stalwart, Stoic, Cosmopolitan, Vivacious, Sybarite, Natural, Introvert, Deep, Mysterious, Obstinate, Outdoorsy, Dreamy, Hell-bent, Optimistic, Lazy, An Odd Duck (sometimes) n I am comfortable in my own skin :) I hate Chauvinists.. Phew!!

I want this world to be my oyster and me the shining pearl.. Am born with the desire to see this world through rose coloured spectacles.. I try to take my challenges as my opportunities.. My hope is still in pink n my idea is to learn something best from worst.. I extract the best, doesn't matter where I get it from.

Yea sometimes my dopamine goes silly.. lol!! I am not a succinct, others can say the same thing in one line what I say in three.. Am passionately in love with language; words flow in my veins.. Blogging n music any time.. :) I love traveling, gardening, dancing, sketching, writing, reading, painting, photography as well.

Everybody writes good about themselves, but here am gonna tell you about my bad points as well; and may be this separates me from many. Anyways, to start with my bad habits I will start with my laziness. I am lazy sometimes and I hate this habit of mine. *Argh*. I have attitude, but I can make you sure I never misuse it, I use it where I need it the most and it has helped me many times. I sometimes go short-tempered, but then another moment I turn back saying sorry to settle out the whole matter. I don't like insecure people. But I try my best to help out anybody.

n don't ask me to accompany you for shopping.. it sucks!! I am badly addicted to music.. ♪ ♫ ♩ ♬ ♭ ♮ ♯ That's the way I am. Um.. now I can't praise myself anymore.. lol :)